Do any of you have an arch rival?   A nemesis?  Well I do!  The worst part is that he lives with me and his name is Elvis!   Let me preface this with I agreed to the dog and it was a mutual decision by Dan and I.  Let me also add that I live on about 4 hours of sleep and my reasoning skills are dull at best.   Anyway, the day that we got him my mom happened to call me.  Now I knew that there were going to be a few people that were going to react to us getting a dog and I fully expected my mom to be one of those people and she didn't disappoint.   So I said to my mom on the phone, "Bei loves the puppy that Dan bought him."   And my mom said, "What puppy?  It is not a REAL LIVE breathing puppy is it?"   Yes mom it is a real live puppy.   Then the next things out of her mouth was "well you know it is going to pee and poop!"   Yes mom, it has already pee'd and pooped that is what dogs do.   Okay, I'll admit I said it kind of condescending like duh?  Hello? Like I don't know it is going to pee and poop?    Fast forward two days into our new lives with Elvis and I want to say that dog is a PEEING and POOPING machine!!!!   I swear that dog pee's and poops every 20 minutes!   And besides eating the food that Kai has dropped I have never seen the dog eat any of his own food! 

 I'll spend 15 minutes outside with the darn dog saying every 30 seconds "go potty, go potty, go potty" and nothing.   He promptly comes in and pee's on the rug!  While I was dealing with exploding diapers with Kai last week, guess who was puking all over my house...yes my little buddy Elvis!    This week he tried to bring in a dead bird into the house.   I had to outwit him to drop the darn thing so he wouldn't bring it in...and then I had to discard the bird.  Eeek!  Now I have two little ones teething, Kai and now Elvis.   Both love to chew on everything.   The clincher for me though was when I was cleaning out a toy that Kai stuffs all sorts of things in.   You are suppose to hammer balls into the top of it and then watch the balls wind their way down through the next opening.   Kai sticks everything it, so I have to unclog it constantly.   I had it upside down and things were dropping out and I saw a little black super ball and wondered where we got it from because Kai could choke on it.   Hmmm...doesn't feel like a super ball and didn't smell like a super ball after I squeezed it a little...darn Elvis!    So mom let me re-phrase my snarky comment to you  "what were you saying about a puppy?" 

Don't let that cute little face fool you...he is diabolical!  Don't worry I love him...a little.


nina said...

Don't ever squeeze anything unless you know what it is!!! I have learned from experience!! Hoping things get better for you soon!

Jeannine said...

Darn that mother of ours...When you told her Bei got a dog didn't she say she hopes its a stuffed animal. Hope you get more sleep soon. Love you, Jeannine

Jeannine said...

Liz, I wanted to call you and let you know that I found myself in your crabby pants today. First...who would have thought I could fit into your pants, but I did! I was so crabby. I thought about how you tell Bei when you are crabby that you are wearing your crabby pants. Just thinking about wearing crabby pants made me smile. Thanks for being such a funny and wonderful sister.