CODE RED! CODE RED!

Here is a quick funny story about Dan.   Last Saturday I went to visit my dad who lives several hours away and Dan graciously stepped in to take care of the kids.  Throughout the day I would call and check in on Dan and the kids and they were doing great!  He had taken them bowling and invited his sister along with her two daughters and also included a friend of his, Cliff.   Okay, so the man is not stupid...he has to take care of the kids and surrounds himself with an army of caretakers.  As I am driving back to our house, I call Dan when I am about 10 minutes away and mention that I need to pick up Kai's medication.  Are things okay on the homefront?  Can I go run this errand now that I am back in the vicinity and the answer is "absolutely, everything is going great"   Mind you, Dan is now home alone with the kids.    So I run the errand, make a quick phone call to my mom and as I walk through the door of our house, Dan shouts "CODE RED! CODE RED!  GET OFF THE PHONE!  CODE RED!"  What?  What the heck is going on?   Dan shouts "KAI POOPED! AND IT IS ALL OVER EVERYTHING!"  Dan runs Kai over to me and throws him in my arms.  Ummmmm....he has not wiped this kid down...I now am a part of "everything" that has poop on it.    I wipe Kai down, take him upstairs and give him a bath.   When I come down Dan explains to me how the CODE RED transpired.   Dan had just gotten done feeding Kai.  Took him out of his high chair and thought he had food in his diaper...which by the way he does often.  He took his clothes off of him and when he took the diaper off it was full of POOP!   Dan was not prepared with any wet wipes or anything to wipe him down.  So he took paper towels and wiped him down...unsuccessfully I might add.   He said he turned away for a minute from Kai to turn back to see poop foot prints all over the kitchen floor.  Dan found Kai still walking around with a big chunk of poop stuck to the bottom of his foot!   CODE RED!  CODE RED!   Dan later said to me "Liz, you were like an Angel walking through that door." 

In the future I will have to implement the CODE RED and see who my angel is.   But I have to admit, it is nice to be needed, even if it is to wipe butts! 

The picture above is An exhausted Daddy and Kai after a CODE RED!

Fw: Whose Blog Are You Reading?

 

 

 

Most people who know me know that I love to read.  I love to know what other people are currently reading or what they have read in the past.   I love talking about books!   Well, it is kind of that way with blogs now.  I notice when I talk with people in the adoption community I love to know whose blog they are reading.   So, I have been thinking that I would share with you some of the blogs that I enjoy reading and what I enjoy about them.    

 

www.1diamond1ruby1pearl.blogspot.com

 

 

 

I was really surprised when I came across this family's blog because they adopted a child that I thought about asking for her file before we accepted Kai's file and they are from Minnesota.   So it was fun for me to see where she landed and how she is doing.   The blog has absolutely beautiful pictures because her mom is a photographer.  The pictures alone keep bringing me back to the blog.   I really think Diana, the mom, is extremely eloquent and really speaks from her heart in a very thoughtful and thought provoking way.   There have been so many times that I wanted to link her blog to mine and just write "yeah...what she said"  And then tell people to insert Bei and Kai's name where appropriate.   But I figure people would not only think that was very lazy on my part but insincere.  Oh well...read her blog anyway and insert Bei and Kai's name in where she talks about how blessed and rewarded she is etc. etc.   

 

 

www.4ourkiddos.blogspot.com

 

www.nihaoyall.com

 

 

There are 3 reasons why I enjoy reading these two blogs.  The first reason is that I love how youthful both these mom's look.  They look like they are one of the kids rather than the mom...I think I am envious.   Being the "old mom" is never fun, but looking like the "old mom" is even worse!   ISo these two young looking lady's are not that much younger than me, but you wouldn't know it.   Secondly, I am awed and amazed at how many kids they have and...how young they look!   Bei aged me at least 5 years and Kai...oh my gosh...I don't even look in the mirror anymore when I put on my make-up.  The funny thing is that Amy from 4 our kiddos just got back with her 6th child and Stephanie I think is going on number 10 or 11.  A friend once told me that you are only as happy as your most miserable kid!  Yikes, with 10 kids what does that mean?   I have two kids and I feel like I am chewed up and spit out at the end of the day.  I have had a 1 year old give me an arse whooping for the past 12 months, so I think these women are amazing!   The 3rd reason is that their blogs are usually happy and upbeat and both take beautiful pictures.

 

 

www.memoriesoncloverlane.blogspot.com

 

www.thepioneerwoman.com

 

 

Both of these are non-adoption blogs that I enjoy.   If the Clover Lane woman wrote books I would buy every single one of them.   She has this practical sense about her that you just can't find anymore. At times I feel that she is speaking to me directly and so much of what she writes about parenting resonants with me.   One of my favorite lines that she said is that when  people think you are crying about the apples, they don't know it is really the oranges that have gotten to you.   I just love that saying because I have always felt that when I have cried I am really crying about things that have been bottled up for a long time and now I finally have a reason to cry and so I am going to let it all out.  Silly...I know!      Anyway, I enjoy her blog very much.

 

You all may have heard of the Pioneer Woman because she has been on the Food Network and has several cookbooks.   Most of you know that I love to cook and most recently I decided I would follow Ree's recipe's just to change things up a little bit.    I made the Shrimp Quesdilla's, which were to die for!  And then made the meatballs with pineapple and green peppers.  The meatballs were delicious but the sauce wasn't as good.   So I would make the meatballs again and use them in another dish.  

 

To be continued... 

 

  

Chicken Little

Recently somebody asked me how I stay so calm while Kai is having either a seizure or passes out.    I think my calmness is more of a surprise for those who know me well because under pressure I am a self-described "chicken with her head chopped off" type of gal.  You wouldn't want to rob a bank with me.  My partner in crime would yell "this is a stick up"  and I would probably raise my hands and scream to call the police and rush out the door. Oops, I lost my head and forgot I was suppose to be one of the bad guys.   I'm just not that good under pressure.   However, I think the only reason that I have remained so calm during Kai's daily pass-outs and seizures is that it caught me totally off guard while I was in China.   I was so jet-lagged and tired that by the time I realized what was going on, I was use to it.  I feel like I never got any sleep while I was in China because during the day I was worried that Kai was going to die from the passing out  or the seizures, which are two totally separate things that he does.   At night, I was worried that he was going to accidently smother himself while he slept because remember Kai couldn't even roll over when we got him at 14 months.  No sleep for me at night either!   I was up every fifteen minutes checking on him.   At night as I laid in bed, I would have this scenario run through my head about if Kai died while we were in Communist China what would happen to us.  In this dream, Dan and I are standing before the Chinese Authorities and they are demanding to know who is responsible for this horrible death.  I am standing next to Dan, but slightly behind him, just far enough behind that he can't see me out of the corner of his eye.   So when they are demanding to know who is at fault, I am jerking my head toward Dan and mouthing the words "the big guy, take the big guy with you".    I know one of us is going to the labor camp and there is no way I am going.  Poor Dan, I totally throw him under the bus!   He can handle it because he is a pressure person and thrives on it.  Me, they would break me within 30 seconds.  If they did take me into custody they would probably be sorry within minutes and say "this woman acts like a damn chicken with her head cut off"     If they even mention the word torture to me I would tell them everything they wanted to know - all the state secrets - Obame is really a secret KGB agent, Hillary is really a man.  I would spill the beans about everything and anything, even if I had to make it up.   Happily, this scenario never happened and we made it out of China without any brushes with the Chinese Authority.  In the end I know it is through God's good grace and love that I am able to push past my natural instincts of panicking and instead be a calming force for my Sweetie Pie in his time of need.   

 

The pictures above were taken at Christmas time.   The one is of my mom and Kai.  After my mom left at Christmas time I told everybody that I had a visit from Super Nanny.   My mom coached me through some issue's that I was having with Bei at the time.   Nobody is going to tell you like it is, except your mom, which I am grateful for.   Thanks Mom!  I think we whipped him in shape pretty well!

Ear Tube Surgery Results

 Who needs a carnival when you can get free high chair rides!

 Bei checking on brother to make sure he is enjoying his ride!

 A little farmer boy!

The boys like to play in my laundry baskets.

Kai's hearing definitely has improved, which allows him to be much more engaged with us.   He is vocalizing much more now, kind of like he is hearing his voice for the first time.  He likes to scream and is trying to say consonants, but really no words.  If he is desperate he will say Mama.   His balance has also improved but he still isn't walking on his own. Believe me he needs to walk soon because his mom's guns are ready to give out soon!  The surgery has bonded us even closer so he likes to be held even more...kid you weigh a ton!!     One of the fun things that he is doing is starting to tumble, he isn't able to do it on his own but we are more than happy to help him out with a boost to the hinder binder.  One last thing but one of the most remarkable is that he is getting much more use of his arms and hands.  He even tries to do the itsy bitsy spider with me.   Let me just tell you that he is a happy, happy little boy who is just a joy to have in my life.   I am so very lucky to have him as my little guy.  

Let me finish with a funny story that happened to us this summer;

We drove up to the cabin one Friday night and once we got there we started upacking as we usually do; Dan carries one kid in and I carry the other one and then Dan puts the cooler and suitcases into the kitchen and then I usually put everything away.    So we did our usual routine, the kids are playing in the family room, while I unpack and Dan walks in.   He immediately stated, "I smell sewer gas".   "Me too! and boy does it stink!"  I answered.  There is a house being built next door to the cabin, so I told Dan to check outside and see if they had hit a gas main and I would check the basement for the smell.   We came back together and Dan said there was no smell outside and there was no smell downstairs.   I told Dan I had located the smell to the northeast corner of the family room.  So Dan said, "Maybe a mouse died under the couch".  "Liz, can you move Kai so I can pick up the couch?"   Nope, no dead mouse, but yes, there is a definite sewer gas smell over in this area.   "Liz, can you move Kai, so I can pick up the chair?"   Nope, no dead mouse, but yes, there is a definite sewer gas smell over in this area.   "Liz, can you move Kai, so I can pick up this other chair?"  Nope, no dead mouse, but yes, there is a definite sewer gas smell over in this area.   So are all of you ahead of me on this?  Do you know where this is leading?   With that Dan said, "Liz, are you sure it is not Kai?   Smell his diaper and see if he pooped?   Okay, someone with alot higher I.Q. would have turned to her husband and said "No thank you darling, it is YOUR turn to smell the kids diaper"   But no, I am not that smart and took a big whiff because I knew that it was not humanly possible to smell that bad...as I was brought to my knees by the smell, I realized I was unfortunately wrong!  Next time you think you smell sewer gas, check the nearest diaper!  Whew...stinky! 

Humble Pie is Yucky!

 

 The happy little boy who finally got tubes put in his ears despite his bonehead mom!

The big brother who has been really good about all the attention Kai has been receiving lately!

You always hear the phrase "Motherhood humbles you", on December 23rd I got a good dose of the humbles that I think will last me a few years...thank you very much.    Kai was scheduled to get tubes put in his ears on December 23rd with a 6:30 a.m. check in time.  We have really been anticipating this surgery because of his chronic ear infections, sleep issues, balance and speech issues.  We have had high hopes that this simple procedure was going to be somewhat of a cure all.   The night before the surgery, I slept with one eye open because I was so worried that I wouldn't wake up on time and we would miss the appointment.   Dan manages to wake me up at 5:30 and by 6:00 a.m. I scoop up my little dumpling from his bed and off to Minneapolis we go.  All is going great, Kai is content, the drive is stress free and we make it on time.    We get checked in with the paper work and are in the waiting room waiting to get called to pre-op when I hear "Alexander K..".   I look up and there stands a brunette Nurse Ratchett (remember One Flew Over the Cuckcoo's Nest), the humourless, efficient nurse that took revenge on her patients.   I swallow hard and decide not to inform her that we call our little guy Kai Kai Sweetie Pie.   Once we are in the pre-op room, Alexander is weighed, temp, BP taken and new clothes are put on him with much efficiency.   Then Nurse Ratchett starts asking me questions in rapid firing session. I feel the need to answer her questions quickly and accurately, like a contestant on a game show.   "Has he had a fever in the last 24 hours? No!  When was the last time he ate solids? 9:00 p.m. When was his last milk bottle?  3:23 a.m.  Uh oh...I get "the look" from Nurse Ratchet and my stomach sinks to my feet.   What is wrong I ask?   She said "no milk after 12:00 p.m."   Are you sure?   I don't want to believe that I made this huge mistake!  My mind immediately goes to finding someone I can blame this on...this CAN NOT be my fault!   I immediately say well I received a voice message from a nurse who told me solids til midnight and a bottle til 4:00 a.m. (this is truly what I thought I had heard).   Nurse Ratchett turns and looks at me squarely in the eye and says "I personally phoned you yesterday and left that message."  She then corrects me with what the right times of the message.  As I'm shrinking in shame, I'm thinking darn it, I can't blame her!  It still has to be somebody elses fault because I don't want to be the person responsible for such a STUPID but CRITICAL mistake.   So they send me home and we have to reschedule Kai's appointment.   On the drive home, my mind is racing to find someone to blame...Ah Ha! Dan...somehow I need to make this is HIS fault.  Ugh...I just don't want to be responsible for doing something that is so careless and affects my little guy so negatively.  I hate that part!   In the end, every which way I turned it, there was nobody else to blame but me.  Let me tell you sometimes humble pie is really yucky tasting.   By the time I get half way home, I realize that I am going to have to tell my Type A husband that his C minus wife, who he thinks flys by the seat of her pants screwed up their little boys very important surgery.   So what do you think I did?   I did what every educated self-respecting woman would do and I cried and sobbed in my husbands arms!  Dan was supportive and understood I felt embarrassed and sad that I had failed my little guy.  

This whole episode makes me pause because I wonder what real criminals feel like after they commit a crime?  Do they have regret?  Do they want a 'redo'?  I by the way, got to have a 'redo' and I decided if Kai and I had to stay up all night because he wouldn't sleep without a bottle in the middle of the night, we would do it.   And that is exactly what happened.  He woke up at 3:30 a.m. for his bottle and we were awake until 5:00 and had to get up at 5:30...but the lack of sleep doesn't matter because Kai Kai Sweetie Pie now has ear tubes in his sweet little dumpling ears!  Yeah!  



Boys

The other day I caught Kai happily sitting in Dan's briefcase, playing with some cords.   You can see how delighted he is that Bei has come to join him. 


For the first 2 months of Bei's preschool, Bei would either cry and/or the teacher would have to physically take him off of me...break my heart!   The teacher kept reassuring me that he was making progress and she guided me to create a dropoff routine...she has been such a saint!  Well anyway, several weeks ago, I dropped Bei off and expected the same drama and instead he said 'bye mom'.   And there has been no more drama.  I am so very proud of that little boy!    Recently I asked him why he doesn't cry anymore and he said 'because I know you are going to come back'.    I am amazed that he is that in touch with his feelings and can articulate it.  However, it makes me so sad that he really worried that I wasn't coming back...that has been his reality already in his short life.   I can't change Bei's past, but I can build a future for him and Kai where they can trust me no matter what the circumstances are, I will be there for them. 

Another big change for Bei is that he now LOVES Kai Kai Sweetie Pie!   If you would have asked Bei several weeks ago if he liked his brother, he would give you a straight-up 'No'.   We have not been overly pushy about 'forcing' him to like his brother.   We believed it would come when Kai could interact and engage more with Bei.    About a week ago, Bei announced out of the blue that 'I love Kai'.   He ran up and gave Kai a hug.   I was skeptical, but I have to admit, he has pretty much changed his tune.  Everyday, he is loving on Kai and plays and interacts with him.   I haven't put the pieces of the puzzle together that created the change in Bei, but at this point, it doesn't matter.   I like it! 

Remember mid-November, I wrote that Kai is walking?  Right after that he had the febrile seizure, he regressed in his developmental growth significantly.     He became all wobbly and shaky again.   The best way to describe how Kai looked when he moved or tried to walk is to compare him with those dolls that have those round joints at the elbows and knee's and their legs and arms twist and turn in places that are not humanely possible.   Sometimes he would be trying to walk and his legs would be going in directions that I thought would not only be impossible, but it should hurt most people.  He is like a gumby doll, the Neurologist said he would make a great yoga instructor some day.   Anyway, that has all changed this past week.  It is like a switch was turned on and he is standing up all by himself in the middle of a room, he is walking along walls, standing for long periods of time and attempting to walk again.   He is my miracle baby!   Is it wrong to admire your child?  Everyday I am blown away by the feats and accomplishments of this child.   And then on top of his strong little work ethic, is the sweetest, most loving personality.  I fall deeper in love with Kai Kai Sweetie Pie everyday!

More Medical...

 I love this picture of Bei and Grandpa Builder Bob!

What a beautiful face!

When I looked at my calendar tonight for the month of December, it wasn't full of doctor appointments like the past two months.   Some of the doctor appointments were scheduled, but many of our doctor visits have been unplanned visits.   Kai has had chronic ear infection that appears to be resistant to the normal amoxicillin.   He was treated with 3 different antibiotics each one stronger than the next with the last being an IV.   Hmmm...are you thinking what I am thinking?    That the reason why Kai (and me) can't get a good nights rest is because of this chronic ear infection?   So, I scheduled an appointment with an ENT doc and Praise the Lord, they are going to put tubes in his ears!   I am so excited for him!   I'm just thinking that the fluid in his ear is affecting so much of who he is, balance? sleep deprivation?  babbling/talking?   They also told us he has a mild hearing loss and that they can only test his good ear.   The doctor said they won't know if he has true hearing loss until the tubes are in.  To be quite honest, I was really impressed with how well he did during the hearing test because he was hearing alot better than I thought previously.   The other concern with Kai has been his teeth.  He has what is commonly called bottle mouth.   It is where they leave the bottle in the mouth of a baby whose teeth are developing and the teeth don't form correctly.   We were at the cabin the other weekend and all of a sudden I noticed that Kai now has a big gap between his two front teeth.  Dang!  His teeth are disingrating in front of my eyes.   Kai is missing the enamal on his two front teeth and then the next two on either side didn't develop properly.  As he is put under for his ear tubes, a pediatric dentist will come in and cap his 4 teeth and check for cavaties.   Hurray!  I know it is crazy to be excited that your child is going under anesthesia but I think these are such important things that will change his life.   So please pray for our little Kai Kai Sweetie Pie that his surgery that is planned for mid December goes well.