Rated R

I had envisioned a scenario of Bei "testing out" bad language when he is 13 years old, not 3 years old. I already have "the talk" in my head about "we don't use that kind of language in "our" household...you know the moral high ground and all that stuff...blah, blah, blah". Here is what happened to set me straight; on the way to the cabin, we stopped at Menards to pick up a vanity cabinet for our cabin bathroom that is being remodeled by Grandpa Builder Bob. The back of the pick-up was pretty crammed already with stuff that we were bringing up, but Dan somehow figured a way to wrestle the vanity into the truck. We drove away from Menards and then proceeded up the ramp towards the interstate. Dan said, "Liz, look behind you, the vanity has already tipped over." I look behind me and I said "what vanity, it is not there any longer". Dan said "Oh shit!", then I said "Ohhhh shit!". Dan stops the truck and I get out to double check that the vanity isn't there and I come back and say "Holy shit, the vanity is gone!" Dan and I lock eyes and we both say "oh shit!". Bei then says "oh shit!". Dan mumbles "oh shit, it is probably in a million pieces". Dan starts backing down the ramp of the interstate and I say "Holy shit Dan, slow down". Bei says "Holy shit Dan". Finally...Dan and I realize that that there is a third party here...Bei, and he is thinking it is pretty fun to say the word "shit". Uh oh...

Just to finish the story, Dan finally did a U-turn and drove the wrong way down the ramp and I wanted to shout out an "oh shit", but kept it to myself. We found the vanity laying on the opposite lane of a 4 way highway in front of Menards. I ran out and pulled it to the side of the road. All of this was to the amusement of Bei. For some reason, he was laughing and giggling through all of this and thought it was very funny that mommy was running in the middle of the road. He tried saying "shit" a few more times on the way to the cabin and Dan and I just ignored it and he hasn't said it since...the little shit!


Peter and Alison plus 3 said...

HILARIOUS!!!! Laughed out loud through the whole post! I can just picture it! HA!

FromKell2Bei said...

Hey Aunt Liz and Uncle Dan!

Love the title! You have to remember that every little kid finds his or her word in the swearing world. It's normal, but it can get out of hand!

For example, I used to say when I was six, "Every Fricken day we pass this house!"

I guess once mom told me, "Try this word instead." I stopped. If Bei Bei begins to say it again- try the replacement method.

Sorry I'm acting like a mom! But my friends have so many little sisters and brothers it's hard not to learn something with every visit!

And anyway, I'm sure you already know what to do. It's is SO natural the way you act and SO collected when you deal with Bei Bei!

Carl Storck said...

That is what you get for shopping at Menards. Look what shopping there has done to you and Dan, and now Bei has been exposed to that degenerate home improvement (term used loosely) establishment and the vile influence the company places on society. Please do not expose your son to that despicable, degnerate store in the future. Hopefully he will forget the latest incident. Shopping at Menards is similar to being around Mexicans with Swine Flu. Please keep him away from those dangers.

Signed, a concerned human being who does not shop at Menards.